Marriage –When kids and the Jobs are gone – what then?

Once children have come of age, they need to ‘fly out of the nest’ so to speak. They need to leave their parents’ home and build a life for themselves. This is nature’s way.

There are, however, instances where the parents do not want to let children go. I think that that comes from fear of not being needed or wanted any more. But children have the right to their own lives; mistakes and success. They deserve to experience all facets of life with all the ups and downs it brings.

The question of ‘what shell I do now?’ does come up at times; a vacuum one may not know how to fill.

For us this was never a problem, because we married each other - not the kids. They were the product of our love, not the aim, neither the centre of it.

With them gone, we had a chance of another honeymoon; filled with the experience, knowledge, and may be some wisdom we may have gained, within the years.

Now came the time to solely enjoying one another’s company, grow and develop and experience new things and ventures.

I am a great believer that we should experience and learn all we can while on this earth. I do not think one gets a second chance at that; not in this time and place in any event. So why waste it?

I must confess at this juncture, that the most difficult time one has to endure and adjust to, is the time when a partner, or both, stop work. This is not as hard on women as it is on men.

Women are better in multitasking, because they have to, and can therefore always find something to occupy themselves.

Men, most of who did only, or practically only, one task at a time, are often lost once they retire. Having lost their job, they often lose their station in life, and at times, the friends they made during their working years.

Those men who did not prepare themselves for their ‘golden age’ are in real difficulties, and not knowing what to do with themselves, they nag their spouses to the ends degree.

There are also those who think that even though they have nothing to do, their wives should continue to look after them: cook, clean, launder, serve them and so on. This never works, and is very contentious.

It is the hardest time in a marriage, as far as I am concerned, and can only be solved by discussing and putting down parameters for both to live by.

A couple must acknowledge the uniqueness of each other, allow them the time to pursue their individual goals, and respect their need of their private space.

Renate Artist, poet and the author of From the Promised Land to the Lucky Country To see more of my book click on this link


To look inside my book Click here



It’s a long time since I posted animals stories, or mentioned them in any shape or form. Today, I’d like to air some of what I think and feel, which I have not voiced before.

From day to day we find out more about the animals that share our world, and I often wondered, why we humans think we are the top of creation; shying away from recognising animals’ abilities we do not understand.

More surprising is the fact that we equate and judge other species by our own criteria and our own abilities, which do not include that which we do not see, feel, hear, or acknowledge.
Even more surprising is the belief some of us have, that it is our god given right to do, or use, other species in any way we please;
We human, enslave them, hurt them, and experiment on them for a so called “our own good” - How disgusting!

Many animals I came across do amazing adjustments to live and survive in our midst:
We never learn to adjust to the language our dogs speak - they adjust to us.
We put animals in circuses to entertain us - teaching them tricks that are out of their natural range of movements, and they do – even when it hurts them.
AND we take away their freedom, by putting them in zoos; for us to watch every single movement they do,
We deny them the right to live the way nature intended, AND we put them in laboratory cages to cut them, maim them, induce illness in them, genetically change them; under the rotten excuse of ‘Scientific Research”, just because they cannot object, or if and when they do - we shoot them!

I have said my piece here and I hope many of you are enrage just as I am.

Having said that, I’d like to show you some of the amazing things animals do and how they interact with us, and at times, form friendships across the species divide, by their own want and volition. So here I go:

Our son and family had a cockatiel in a cage, to which, as you already know I strongly object. However, they were going for holiday and gave us the bird to look after while they were gone.
It came in a large cage that same evening; with clothe to cover the cage for the night, a packet full of food; and a string of instructions to follow.
Come morning I take the clothe off the cage as instructed, said hello and good morning to the bird, refresh the water, put some food in the dish , and go back to my morning chores.
The phone rings. The tone is not the usual one our phones have, but it is constant.
I lift the receiver - there is no one at the other end.
I shrug my shoulder, put the receiver down, and return to my chores.
The phone rings again and it is the same story.
After a couple of more calls, I decide to follow its root, and end at the bird’s cage.
Getting there, the ring stops, and the Cockatiel is talking to me.
I say hi and return to my tasks.
The phone rings again.
I come to the cage and the bird is talking to me again.

I try this couple of more times, and realise the bird want to converse with me;
it has learned people come when the phone rings!
I decide to try and communicate.

Gerry and I have a whistle we used to use, before the days of the mobile phone. It was a fairly long and some what complicated segment of a song. I wanted to see how the bird will react.
I told her all about it and then whistled it. She listened intensely, with her head bend to one side and to the other. As I stopped, she said some thing to me that I understood her asking me to repeat it. As I finished, she started to repeat it.
Each time she asked for a repeat, I obliged, and she continued to learn.
She got the first and last parts correctly, but had difficulties getting the middle, which was somewhat more complicated.

We continued to communicate that way for the 10 days she was with us, and it was beautiful. I am sure that if we would have been together permanently, we would have had a large vocabulary between us.

My daughter in law, Lynne, had a Goldfish that we suspect of not being a goldfish at all. It continued to grow and grow and was still alive seven years later.
As it continued growing, it got a bigger aquarium, even though he was on his own. He did not like company and used to eat those that were brought in to keep him company.

To make sure he will not be bored, Lynne put him on the kitchen bench, so that he can be a part of the activities around.
He had a silvery golden colour and two large protruding eyes that followed every move around him.
Every evening, at 5pm on the dot, he will nock on the glass and remind Lynne that it is time for him to get his meal!

I have received the following from EllieBlue on Stumble upon. She was replying to my post about Crows:

I too have a high regard for crows. We had one as a pet. She was knocked out of her nest during a storm. She was very affectionate but naughty. She would sneak visitors’ biros etc from their pockets and my mother's pegs from the clothesline. She loved it when we set up a dish for her to bath in.


To finish off, here is a link to a clip of an elephant painting

Artist, poet and the author of
From the Promised Land to the Lucky Country
To see more of my book click on this link
To look inside my book Click here



While many in the northern hemisphere are still living in snowy condition, we in Australia left our summer, which was no summer, behind; and have officially entered autumn.

Seeing on the news the heavy snowstorms some of you went through, reminded me of our snow experiences when we arrived in Davenport Iowa to study chiropractic. You see, we never lived with snow before.

I thought you’d get a kick out of reading about some of the ‘living with snow’ adjustments we went through. I have therefore copied a small section out of my book – “from the promised Land to the lucky Country,” that illustrates, in a small way, the many surprises we got. I hope you get a giggle or two out of it.

“Living with snow is new to us, and deep winters of below freezing point are something we have never encountered. Of black ice or sleet, we did not even hear. From what we have seen in films and on TV, snow is white and beautiful. We know that people wear heavy winter clothing at snow time, but it never occurs to us how cold it really is, or what being that cold feels like. The coldest we have ever experienced is the occasional 5°C, and that at night, while tucked nicely in our warm beds. And here we are - completely unprepared for what’s coming.

Early on a sunny morning, with not a cloud to be seen and with the house nice and warm, I decide to empty the rubbish. Walking out of the kitchen door, I have the shock of my life when I find myself hitting the footpath with a heavy thump. Sitting there on a very sore, cold and wet behind, I cannot for the life of me figure out what made me fall. Ignoring it, I step off the path and go to the bin next to the drive. There, I slip down the black-ice-covered ramp, and cannot get up again. Lying sprawled on my tummy in full daylight, trying to crawl up the lawn, all I can see is frozen water droplets and nothing to grab hold of. Finally, I give up and walk very slowly along the public footpath and around the corner to the front steps. At the steps, matters aren’t getting any easier. The steps are as slippery as the car ramp is, and sloped as well. In desperation, I hang on to the single pipe side-rail that is just as frozen. With all the might and determination I can muster, and with hands burning as if I have just been cooked alive, I succeed in getting to the front door exhausted. “

Artist, poet & the Author of
From the Promised Land to the Lucky Country  

To read reviews and testaments go to http://www.promisedland-renate.com

To look into the book Click here

Bicurim feast in the kibbutz highschool
Hi Walter and Annette, Thanks for the feedback. Pleased you enjoyed reading it. What happened to the boat, comes in a period after the book ends and maybe a part of the next book...